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Ways to Become the Person You Aspire to Be
Do you believe in the power of your dreams? RIZZARRNovember 28, 2016
As you go through life and work toward your dreams, knowing who you are and who you aspire to be will remain the keys to your succe.Except becoming who you want to be isn’t easy.It requires tremendous courage, perseverance and a steadfast belief in yourself.The road to becoming your best, most succeful self can feel challenging at times and it can take a lot out of you.There will be moments when you might want to give up on yourself and your dreams.You must believe succe is poible, because as you continue on your journey, you will eventually embark upon those moments, the ones that you have always imagined coming true.Related:7 Ways to Persist When Everything in You Wants to Give Up
To motivate you on this pursuit, here are five ways you can become the person who you aspire to be: 1.Be authentic.You cannot grow if you are not true to yourself.You have to be honest with yourself about what you are paionate about and who it is you really want to be, despite critics and naysayers.2.Have vision.People’s dreams perish for lack of vision.Without having the idea in mind of who you want to be, you will not know where or how to aim for it.Keep your vision top of mind as you reach each milestone to motivate you to push forward.3.Embrace a never-give-up attitude.Curveballs will forever be coming your way as you pursue your dream.You might have moments when you want to throw in the towel because you just can’t keep fighting all the challenges and setbacks you encounter.But you have to push through and realize you really do have everything you need to reach your full potential.4.Remove the naysayers and self-doubt.Most people settle for le.And many of those same people will also convince you to settle for le.That’s when that self-doubt invades your thoughts.You might have moments when you no longer believe in your dreams—you have to push aside those moments, people and your own self-limiting beliefs.Always move forward.5.Believe in yourself.As author Richard Bach once wrote, “You are never given a dream without also being given the power to make it true.” So no matter how discouraged you might get at times, you must know that if you can dream something, then you will always have everything in you to make it come true.You just have to believe in yourself and your abilities to achieve what you set your mind to.Below, let‟s share four research-backed tips to help you craft and carry out succeful goals.Choose a goal that matters, not just an easy win.Our brains are wired to love rewards, so we often set simple goals that make it easy to check off boxes.Did you go to the gym today? Check.Did you write in your journal? Check.“It feels really good to set a goal,” says McGonigal.“People often set them just for the burst of optimism they get when they vow to make a change.” But if that‟s all our New Year‟s resolutions are about, no wonder we end up abandoning them so quickly.A meaningful goal — one that truly inspires you to change — requires going deeper.“Give yourself permiion and time to think about what it is you want to experience in your life or what‟s getting in the way,” says McGonigal.Think about what you want in the coming year, then ask yourself why you want that — three times in a row.For example, if you want to quit smoking, ask why do you want to quit? Then, if you want to quit for your health, ask why do you want good health? Then, if your answer is to be alive long enough to meet your grandchildren, ask why do you want to meet your grandchildren? “You get to something that just feels so obviously important to you,” says McGonigal.It really drives home why that goal matters, and that motivation can bolster you as you work toward the goal.Focus on the proce, not the outcome.When we set goals, it‟s easy to fixate on that magical ending when we‟ve reached the goal and everything is better.But we can‟t control outcomes, and we certainly can‟t will them into existence(though this writer has tried, many times).We have to inch toward them, one choice at a time.“People often get lost thinking they have to change everything all at once,” says McGonigal.“But small changes can pave the way for bigger changes.” Ask yourself, what is the smallest thing I can do today that helps me reach my goal? For example, if you‟re shy and you want to be more outgoing, you might accept someone‟s invitation to lunch or say hi to someone you usually walk past in the hallway.From there, just follow the breadcrumbs — one small choice after another.“You can make very, very small changes that are consistent with your big goals without having to understand how you‟re going to get to the endgame,” says McGonigal.If you make daily choices that are consistent with your goal over and over again, you will eventually reach it — though it may look nothing like what you expected.Frame your goals positively.How you describe your goal makes a big difference.Focusing on what you want to bring into your life — not what you want to avoid — will make you more likely to actually pursue it.“That‟s basically just brain chemistry,” says McGonigal.“Any sort of avoidance is going to trigger inhibition systems, whereas positive goals are going to trigger approach and reward motivation.”
Think about what you want to foster in yourself or what you want to do more often.That positivity can help motivate you when you find yourself slipping.“Saying „I don‟t want to be fat anymore‟ gives you no positive motivation to draw on when you just ate the second box of donuts,” says McGonigal.Be nice to yourself.It works.Prepare for failure(in a good way).Moments of failure are inevitable, but most of us abandon the goal entirely when minor failures and setbacks start piling up.We give up on getting fit when we mi the gym, or we forget about losing weight after a night of burgers and milkshakes.“In that moment when you fail, often the first instinct is to push the goal away,” says McGonigal.“It‟s so uncomfortable to be in that place of self-doubt or self-criticism and guilt.”
Your task is not to avoid failures, but to plan for them.Ask yourself, how am I likely to fail? For example, if you‟re likely to choose unhealthy meals when you‟re hungry, carry a light snack that can tide you over.Psychologists call this an if/then contingency plan, or “if this happens, then I‟ll do that.” It‟s a mental plan for how you‟ll react to things that might trip you up.When detours and roadblocks come up, remind yourself why your goal matters to you.Those simple reminders about why it‟s important can buoy your motivation and keep you headed in the right direction.Who knows, you might just make it past Valentine‟s Day this year.
